Between Dog And Wolf

Warning: Okay, this is a very weird, creepy, unlike me post. So if you are planning to fall in love with me I say don't read it. But you will. You curious lot. Sigh. 

And if you guys have it too, let's talk about it over a cup of coffee. Just kidding. We should ignore each other and spare the awkwardness.

Go away. Now.

Ever got trapped in your own body?  I don’t know many people who have this horrible condition I have thanks to my mum’s genes. Sleep Paralysis. This spooky hereditary disorder sounds intriguing.  It has all the classic signs and symptoms of a terrifying nightmare:

-          You can’t breathe.

-          You can’t move.

-          You can’t speak

-          Intense fear.

-          This awful feeling of someone doing gymnastics on your body.

-          Sometimes a tearing pain will pass through you.

-          And sometimes you will vibrate like your cell phone.

-          You might hallucinate. Catch a glimpse of a spirit, ghost, beast  or your own self

-          A certain sense of an evil presence surrounds you.

-          Astral project into the other worlds. At least some people claim to.

-          Lucid dreaming. 

I was 11 when I first experience the ghastly Sleep Paralysis.  Now, 10 years later (or is it 11? I suck at math) it still happens, frequently.  Okay. 

As much as I like to think that it is a group of alien experimenting on me OR an old hag has taken a fancy to me OR a person has created my voodoo doll – it’s not that interesting after all. UnFortunately, it has a scientific explanation (to my relief and disappointment!). No paranormal stuff like black magic... Or is it? I am doubtful. 

Sleep Paralysis occurs due to this random mis-transmission of chemicals. Your body is all ZzZzZz and your mind is like O_O and these things you see and feel are just in your imagination.You are between the states of consciousness and unconsciousness. 

So after battling with insomnia (or rather sleep-phobia) and caffeine addiction I am finally getting over it.  They say just go with the flow, scrunch up your face and wriggle your toes. You will be okay in a few minutes. Or…

You’ll die from Sudden Unexplained Nocturnal Death Syndrome (SUNDS) True Story. 

Now I'll go to bed. I hope it won't happen..

But It Will. 

February Is Over. March Doesn't Seem To Be My Month.

A crappy day is fine. Two crappy days are also fine.. but a CRAPPY week is so not dandy. 

Let's begin.

On Tuesday I woke up by falling out of my bed. I tried to catch my flying fishes for 2 minutes when it dawned upon me they were actually in a dream. Crap. I keep dreaming about colorful translucent fishes that fly around me. How mysterious.  And come on fishes, I don't like you. I don't even consume you. Stop invading my dreams.

Shampoo stings my eyes every morning. I have to suffer from red itchy watery eyes for half an hour. Some issues, I guess.

I have to go on a ultra-jumpy bus with my classmates daily. Imagine springing up and down for 45 minutes in a row. Am sure when we get off our organs aren't in their original positions. The hospital is getting way too unpleasant to bear. General surgery sucks.

yeah, something like this.

My friend and I bought the same exact dress. How can we outshine? It's appalling.

I studied for the test like a dweeb. The test was student-friendly. I wish I hadn't wasted precious hours going through the fat book when I could have aced it by hitting the thin booklet.

I broke my almost-new shoes on Wednesday. Had to use a safety pin. My friends and I, in my broken shoe, went shopping. The safety pin kept biting me. Now I have a blackish thumb and a callus on my small toe as big as a cow. <-- Shoes and I don't gel, don't you think? Flat pumps or heels, they all hate me.

These days I end up watching depressing and brutal movies. Rabbit hole, The talented Mr. Ripley, Mr. Brooke - They are all neat and go with my mood. <-- who needs to smile? Me.

Now the Big Crappy News: I have pharyngitis, 102 f fever and very severe body-ache that am unable to walk. It gets better and it recurs. My voice is croaky like a frog. Blahhh.

I missed today's OT because of my (un)health. My friend tells me it's bloody, suffocating and very interesting. Why couldn't I be sick last week?? <-- I had my scrubs ready, and I so wanted to wear them. 

sick n crappy. 

Enough crap for one post. Am off to eat porridge and apples <-- Yay? and then back to my warm bed for a little snooze.    

croak, croak.

Sidrah xx o(-_-)o