I spent two weeks in pure torture. The bleak miserable days. They make me shudder. I thought I would never be my normal self again. I was too nocturnal. I was too busy. I was too lost in the deep dark pathological pages and words which hardly comfort me, or were there by my side when I was being lashed out by the examiner during viva, or racking my brain so hard to remember the name of one pure infectious bacteria that I am surprised it isn't wracked. I gave up tea for one whole week. Tea repelled me. Yes, can you believe it? Sidrah, the great tea lover, couldn't drink tea! I didn't watch movies for like 8 days! I didn't come online for 10 days! Heck. (Except for those teeny weeny peeks in the early hours of morning). And you should have seen my face and not to mention my poor hair. The girl in the mirror was not me. My cheeks which I tell you were like apples were no longer there. My eyes were red and had gone two times smaller. My hair were dry. Was I slightly yellow? Oh no.
I was in a trance and everything and everyone around me were blurry hazy things. I didn't care about food, I ate anything they gave me (this they is just my mum). I had hundreds of unread messages. Cell phones were only another mean of discussing stuff we couldn't grasp by ourselves. I was being pulled apart from the rest of the world. I was drowning. And it was not in the water.
Okay. Enough.. To keep myself sane, I decided to read a book for a while. It took me 1 minute to realize I had no Marian Keyes' novels or another like hers to keep me bright and happy, All I had was Anne Rice. The bleak Vampire chronicles, which am addicted to. But a book on vampires and a sad nocturnal creature like me? Bleak. So not right. Hardly in a mood I read a few pages and I was lost. I spent an hour. Precious precious hour. Gone and lost. Not wasted though, I felt better. It was good to know that I still liked to read. Yay! Vampire chronicles is so much better (like way way way way better) than the all time gay twilight series.
I cannot say all my papers went good. Theory was okay, but viva *sigh* am not so sure. If I could, I would give two theory papers in place of a viva. Its not the teacher that scares me, its myself. The stupid blunders I make. I go in as a genius, come out as a fool. I can only blame myself.
Anyway. Am up since 5 am. Not such an insomniac anymore. I sleep at night. Am happy. Will do some unelfish posts soon =) I missed my normal life. So good to be back.
Oh but yes, I still have to study. My finals are a month away. But there is nothing more horrible than mocks. Trust me.
Off to have some tea now. God, I miss it.
 |
| *smile* |
Sidrah xx o(^_^)o
